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It's Saturday primetime, World Rugby (or the IRB or whatever they are called this week) and ITV will have been imagining that this slot would be ratings gold. Instead, England have flopped disastrously and are already out of the tournament and the best that can be said for this game for England is that they are playing for pride. Uruguay will have been looking forward to this game so much more than England. So, I know why I'm watching: I'm paid to and this turned out to be one of my games in the ESPNscrum RWC rota. But why are you watching? I asked Twitter and here are a few of the best replies (if you share your thoughts with @Busfield you too could be included in the liveblog of this prestigious event):
Our man at the game is the great Tom Hamilton, and he will make sense of it for us. Here come the teams:
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| 1 |
0 - 3 |
Anthems followed swiftly by kick off followed swiftly by the first Swing Low followed swiftly by the first penalty of the game... to Uruguay! Straight in front of the posts: 3-0 to Uruguay
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| 2 |
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So, who thinks Uruguay might win this game? Danny Care who is getting a game at last in this World Cup kicks beautifully to the corner and it's a lineout to Uruguay
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| 3 |
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England win the ball and swing it across the backlines. Farrell breaks the line from his new position at centre but is eventually brought down. And then there's a ruck and Tom Youngs grabs an opponent around the neck. He could be in trouble here. No yellow card but a penalty to Uruguay, in their light blue.
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| 4 |
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Uruguay find touch and relieve the pressure.
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| 5 |
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And here's a scrum, which England must surely be expecting to dominate. Then again, they thought that would be the case against Australia and they turned out to be so wrong...
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| 6 |
5 - 3 |
England break from the set-piece and Slade floats the ball out to Nowell who kicks ahead and Watson chases the ball to the endzone and touches it down...TRY (but first a TMO)
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| 7 |
7 - 3 |
The TRY is confirmed and it's England 5-3 Uruguay. With the kick of the deadeye Owen Farrell to come....
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| 8 |
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7-3.
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| 9 |
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Scrum to England and then a first penalty in kicking range but they go for the corner. Lineout and the rolling maul to come...
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| 10 |
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A moment of high comedy almost ensues when Uruguay hooker Carlos Arboleya Sarazola intercepts but he's never going to outrun England from his own 22 and the play is called back anyway. England ball.
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| 11 |
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| 12 |
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Slade loses the ball in the tackle and Uruguay have the scrum.
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| 13 |
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Another rendition of Swing Low echoes around the City of Manchester Stadium, but Uruguay win the scrum and swing the ball to their right and have a couple of phases until there's a forward pass.
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| 14 |
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Swing Low didn''t last long and play is halted as Tom Youngs has some treatment.
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| 15 |
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England scrum in midfield and they push and eventually Uruguay concede a penalty which England kick to touch. One fifth of the way into this game and England lead by 4 points. Good job that England didn't come into this game needing to win by 80 points to advance
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| 16 |
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What am I saying, I so wish this game mattered.
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| 17 |
12 - 3 |
England's penalty is kicked to the corner and the lineout becomes a rolling maul and Nick Easter, old man that he is, is the one to touch the ball down. 12-3.
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| 18 |
14 - 3 |
Farrell converts from an angle. 14-3.
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| 19 |
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Care and Goode put in a couple of deep kicks but Uruguay deal with them comfortably enough and then there's some midfield jousting and the men in blue almost snatch another interception but the ball bobbles out of control.
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| 20 |
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Slade and Farrell are England's 15th centre pairing under Stuart Lancaster.How many will he try out in the next six years of his contract? He's going to see that contract out, right?
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| 22 |
19 - 3 |
Easter gets another try as England camp in the Uruguayan 22 with another of those rolling mauls.
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| 23 |
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Nick Easter is 37. Lancaster trying out the youngsters in this meaningless game.
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| 24 |
21 - 3 |
Farrell - conversion
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| 25 |
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Easter fumbles a high ball and Uruguay have a scrum in England's 22.
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| 26 |
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After a couple of minutes of slow Uruguayan attack, England claim the ball back and Watson breaks fast but he's lacking support and England have to settle for forwards going past the gain line slowly in phases.
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| 27 |
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Sweet Chariot rings out for the third time this evening by my count. How many times will we hear it tonight?
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| 28 |
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It's all a bit scrappy and England cough up the ball.
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| 29 |
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Tom Youngs goes off, several minutes after he probably should've. On comes Jamie George for his RWC debut.
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| 30 |
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And here comes the Mexican Wave.
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| 31 |
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Are you having fun yet?
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| 32 |
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Uruguay are trying to run the ball but eventually knock on. Swing Low Number Four rings out.
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| 33 |
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England's scrum on the edge of their own 22 is shoved back by the lighter Uruguayans. England boot the ball clear but that wasn't particularly impressive. England go through the phases to reach the edge of the blue 22 and Uruguay steal...
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| 34 |
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If one of the teams here are to be credited for inventiveness, it's not England. There's a clear gulf in class but England not capitalising.
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| 36 |
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England switch the ball back and forth and Goode tries to break the line, but it's all a bit too pedestrian.
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| 37 |
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Penalty and England kick for the corner and a lineout.
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| 38 |
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| 39 |
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Ben Cohen doesn't appear to have bothered turning up for "the wrong party!. His Twitter page is full of talk about Strictly Come Dancing.
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| 40 |
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England are near the Uruguay 22 but can't get far and win a penalty in time added on, so they tap and go and the ball reaches Watson out on the wing and there's an Oooh but then an Ahhhh as he's tackled hard. England still have the ball and another penalty and a yellow card to Uruguay's captain. And then the whistle blows. Half-time.
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| 40+1 |
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| 40+2 |
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So, apparently not everyone thinks that Stuart Lancaster will get to see out his six year contract.
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Are you still watching?
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| 40 |
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England attack after a great Nick Easter claim. The ball reaches Watson on the wing for a TRY in the corner!
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| 41 |
26 - 3 |
Dan Cole is off and so is Owen Farrell's conversion. That's a rarity.
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| 42 |
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Ford kicks out wide for Nowell but he can't claim it. Remember, Uruguay are still down to 14 men here after a high tackle.
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| 44 |
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The Uruguay pack are briefly camped on the edge of the England 22 and eventually win a penalty - which they kick for the corner.
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| 45 |
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England contest the lineout and snatch the ball. England then kick the ball back to the light blues and Uruguay are on the attack again.
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| 46 |
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Nowell almost slips clear on the wing but he's tackled into touch.
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| 47 |
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Haskell rampages forward and wins a scrum and England pass the ball with more fluidity than at any other time tonight. Briefly. Before coughing the ball up.
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| 48 |
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Not even a Swing Low in this second half to cheer us up.
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| 49 |
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Uruguay are back to full strength.
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| 50 |
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| 51 |
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For comparison: Uruguay's results in this tournament: 9-54 vs Wales, 3-65 vs Australia, 15-47 vs Fiji
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| 53 |
31 - 3 |
Slade charges down and chases and scores a TRY in the corner!
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| 55 |
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Farrell misses again. From out wide but still...
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| 56 |
36 - 3 |
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| 57 |
38 - 3 |
Goode and Care breaks through and Nowell gets the final touch as England score a TRY in the corner!
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| 58 |
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Farrell boots that one between the sticks and it's 38-3. Uruguay looking tired. England's previously-unused adventurous backs profiting.
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| 59 |
43 - 3 |
Joseph is going to come on and will play alongside Slade. England taking Farrell off - it turns out that England really didn't need a specialist kicker in this game.
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| 60 |
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Swing Low Number Five. And an England rolling maul into the blue 22. Who'd have thunk it.
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| 61 |
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A big shove and Nick Easter gets a hat-trick. That's a boost for England's 2019 RWC campaign. Easter will only be 41 by then.
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| 62 |
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Ford misses the conversion but it's now 43-3 and those points are not particularly (at all) crucial.
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| 63 |
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Alejo Corral coming on for his 50th - and final - cap for Uruguay. They've been out of their class at this competition but have battled and will remember this. Especially if they get a try here with a rolling maul...
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| 64 |
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Uruguay are so close to the England line but can't quite push over. And now they have a penalty and a kick to the corner and they can have another go.
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| 65 |
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England win the lineout and the blue mission goes unfulfilled.
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| 66 |
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Some of you would like some more singing:
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| 67 |
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And is followed by Swing Low Number Five.
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| 68 |
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England TRY in the corner but No, it's a knock on.
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| 69 |
48 - 3 |
England lineout in the corner. Rolling maul follows. Care snipes and gets close to the line but not far enough and back to the forward phases. Lots of shoving at the base of the posts by the England pack and then the ball swings wide and Nowell is in at the corner for a TRY!
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| 70 |
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Ford misses again. Bring back Owen Farrell?!
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| 71 |
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Some scrappy midfield play and the ball eventually reaches Nowell, who is also in with a chance of a hat-trick.
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| 73 |
53 - 3 |
Referee has a chat with the Uruguayan captain explaining that if there are many more penalties he will have to sinbin someone. And then Nowell rings the ball into the corner for his hat-trick. TRY!
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| 74 |
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Ford misses again.
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| 75 |
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Nowell's hat-trick of tries might augur more for the future than Easter's. But it might mean very little really: Uruguay have kept going but that's the best that can be said for them really.
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| 76 |
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Swing Low Number Six.
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| 77 |
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England's forwards inch their way away from the line and then Wigglesworth kicks the ball clear. Uruguay have the ball and are inching their own way into the England half. Swing Low Number Seven.
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| 80 |
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England are awarded a penalty try and Ford has one last chance to kick the ball between the posts.
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| 80+1 |
60 - 3 |
Ford finally kicks one.
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| 80+2 |
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Verdicts:
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| 80+3 |
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Tom Hamilton at the City of Manchester Stadium writes: "Hat-tricks from Nick Easter and Jack Nowell gave England reason to break into the slightest of smiles after what has been a torrid World Cup. As Swing, Low rang out at the end of the match, England had achieved what they set out to in the north of England - the desire to put on a show - but now comes the awkward post-mortem as to why this game effectively meant nothing in the big, wide scheme of things. Alongside Nowell and Easter, Henry Slade was fantastic at outside centre while Danny Care bossed the breakdown superbly. They mustered 10 tries in the end - the last being a penalty try - as they finished on a winning note."
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